Obsession
by Miss Rhapsody
Summary: [2:?]Hermione becomes infatuated with a certain Professor and decides to learn everything she can about him. She knows that she is forbidden to declare how she feels, so she keeps it inside. This leads to an obsession. But what will come of it?
1. Chapter 1

Title: Obsession  
  
Author: Rhapsody  
  
Summary: Hermione becomes infatuated with a certain Professor and decides to learn everything she can about him. She knows that she is forbidden to declare how she feels, so she keeps it inside. This leads to an obsession. But what will come of it?  
  
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
All of the other compartments were full. Everyone had someone to sit by. But Harry, Ron, and I had nowhere to go. We found a compartment that was empty, except for a man. When I first looked at me he struck me as handsome. He wasn't gorgeous, like the men in advertisements. But he was handsome.  
  
He had on tattered robes and carried a worn brown suitcase. His face was young, despite the grey hairs that laced his hair. At first I didn't even notice them. I thought that his hair was bleached by the sun. Later I found out why the man had grey hairs. I understood.  
  
He seemed to peaceful, sleeping there. We tried not to disturb him and he didn't wake during the first part of our journey. His presence kept Draco Malfoy from bothering us. He was convenient. I felt bad at first, using him with the knowledge he was a Professor. He looked like a kind and gentle person, I didn't want to take advantage of that, even if it was only to keep Malfoy away.  
  
I was so terrified of hurting that gentle man. After I learned more about him, I understood what humbled him so much. I understood why he was so kind. He knew pain; he knew sadness; he knew loneliness. When the train stopped and the dementor stepped into our carriage, I was afraid. I was terrified that this man would be hurt.  
  
I felt guilty, like somehow it was my fault that we all reacted the way we did. I thought somehow I could have helped Harry. First year I had helped him get to the Stone. Second year I had helped him discover the Chamber of Secrets. I felt responsible for Harry, and even for Ron. I was the one who figured things out; I fixed things. Harry was the brave one. On the train Harry wasn't brave, and I felt like it was my fault.  
  
The man stopped anything bad from happening. He stopped the dementor. He gave us chocolate. He helped Harry conquer his fears. He took away my job. I was supposed to help Harry. I felt like I had let everyone down. But most of all I felt like I was a burden to that man.  
  
I cared for him. Something in me cared for the man with the brown hair and the bright eyes. Something in me cared for his tattered robes and beat up suitcase. I didn't know why, but from that time on the train I loved the man. I loved him more than words could describe.  
  
I looked forward to his classes. Not the way I used to look forward to Lockheart's classes, it was not an infatuation. It was a desire to help this man. It was a desire to see this man and learn more about him.  
  
So I made that my task. I studied his mannerisms. I learned his appearance. I knew every line on his face. I knew the way he looked when the full moon approached. I knew everything about him that one could know from simple observance.  
  
But something in me wanted more. I couldn't help from still wanting to get closer to this man. So the next day I made my move. I made my decision. I would follow this man to his room and get inside. I needed something of his to study, so I could learn more about him. 


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Obsession  
  
Author: Rhapsody  
  
Summary: Hermione becomes infatuated with a certain Professor and decides to learn everything she can about him. She knows that she is forbidden to declare how she feels, so she keeps it inside. This leads to an obsession. But what will come of it?  
  
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
But something in me wanted more. I couldn't help from still wanting to get closer to this man. So the next day I made my move. I made my decision. I would follow this man to his room and get inside. I needed something of his to study, so I could learn more about him...

Chapter 2

He walked down the corridor slowly, his steps were weary. There was something on his mind. The lines of his face were drawn. He was troubled. I felt a sudden desire to learn what it was. So a trailed a little closer to him. 

I made no noise as I followed less than a yard behind him, hidden beneath an invisibility cloak. He was humming quietly to himself. A song which I recognized from my younger years. I began to hum along with him, inadvertently. 

Suddenly he stopped. My arm brushed his back. I stepped away from him quickly. He turned around and peered right through me. 

"Padfoot?" he asked quietly.

I looked at the lines of his face, which had softened. He shook his head.

"I'm going mad," he said to himself and turned, continuing on his way.

I followed him once more until he reached a portrait of a disheveled looking fairy. It looked rather drunk and was vomiting in the corner of the painting. She stopped purging just long enough to let him into the room and quickly closed hole. 

I was locked out. I slowly sank to the floor and began to weep. I had no knowledge of why I was weeping, but the tears trickled down my cheeks. I slid out from underneath the cloak, becoming visible. I didn't care anymore. Let the world see me. Something inside me felt broken, like I needed to follow him to stay alive. I kept crying silently in the corridor.

I got a lump in my throat and gasped for air. I felt like I was choking. I shut my eyes to try and shut out the feeling, but it persisted. I suddenly realized I was still in another class. I needed to get back to myself.

I ran down the corridors to meet myself by the suit of armor I normally met myself at. My breath was catching in my throat I had to get there. I urged myself on, faster, faster. I had ten seconds, nine, eight...

I collided with myself. I picked myself up off of the floor reluctantly. I wanted to just die there. I had missed my opportunity to get closer to him. I brushed the dust from the floor off of my robes and I began to walk back to my dormitory. A sudden heavy weight on my heart.


End file.
